Something shifts when you stop looking at people for the roles they play in your life: mother, father, daughter, boyfriend, girlfriend, sister, friend, mother in law. Something happens when you remove the expectations of what those roles are supposed to look like and you simply look at them as people.

People that have traumas, ignorance and dramas running through their heads at all time. People made of flesh and bones that have probably been hurt in places we don’t know. People with good and bad, fears and hopes, kindness and sadness….

When we decide to remove ourselves from how their attitudes, words and decisions affect us and are able to look at them. Even for a second, to truly look at them without judgment. With compassion. With an open heart. To be in there shoes and when we see them recognize a tiny bit of ourselves.

In Judaism when you get married you pronounce the words Ani LeDodi VeDodi Li it translates as “I am my Beloved’s and my Beloved is mine,” my interpretation of those words is- in you there is a part of me and in me there is a part of you. We are not separate. What if we can see this in every relationship we encounter? What if we can see the humanity in everybody?  

Holiday season is the perfect time of the year to practice this.

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